What the hell?

{ Sunday, December 25, 2011 }
Yesterday I went out to have dinner with my lovely friend. She's having a relationship with a Somalian guy she met here and she excitedly told me that he would come tonight and that I can meet him! Great, or so I thought.
When we met him, he was indeed charming and friendly. My friend had told me that although he is Muslim, he likes to drink, smoke and has already slept with a lot of girls. That was fine with me, who am I to judge? But when we sat down to have a drink (after we made a whole detour because he wanted to find a place that served alcohol), my friend told him I was not Christian, but Muslim, and he stared at me incredulously. The conversation went something like this:

He: "What? You're not Muslim, I don't believe you!"
Me: "Err..yes I am"
My friend: "I told you the truth, she's Muslim!"
He: "Her hair is uncovered, so she's not Muslim!"


Me: "What? What do you mean?"
He: "You are not Muslim, I don't believe you! You don't cover your hair!"
Me: "Do you want me to recite Quran to prove it to you or what?"
He: "Yes, go ahead!"
I recited Quran.
He: "Maybe you just studied it! You have to cover your hair!"
Me: "What? You drink alcohol!Do you realise it's haraam? Do you realise you can't pray for 40 days after you drank?" 

The conversation continued like this, with him not wanting to believe me and trivialising his own offences. On the way to my apartment, he called me "a bad Muslim" for not covering my hair! I tried to remain calm, but this was unbelievable! I don't want to judge others, but this was definitely a case of misogynistic hypocrisy gone wild. I just hope my friend ends it soon with him, because he's without a doubt one of these guys who wakes up one day wanting to get married to a saint-like virgin who's never been touched while they have been total douchebags but still think they deserve a girl like that because they are Muslim Men and all the non-saint like Muslim girls who are actually human are just sluts. I cringe for the future of Islam if these kind of knobheads with no knob multiply themselves. 

Since when did Islam become all about looks? Does he know anything about my intentions, that he can judge me like that? Is he in any place to decide who's Muslim or not? He was wearing a babypink sweater, did I tell him I don't believe he's a man because men-don't-wear-baby-pink*, I don't think so! 
Anyway, it's pointless to waste anymore time on him, I just needed to get this off my chest. I pray that *some* Muslim men will finally educate themselves on a word called priorities and stop humiliating women like that. In the mean time, I'm going to have a cup of tea.

* to use another stereotype


vimari said...

take it easy. i understand your dissatisfaction. in poland, we have short funny tag " kto się przezywa, ten się sam tak nazywa" - it mean something like "who are experiencing, this one is the same so-called".

what should do a good muslim? i guess love Allah, pray and be a good person. i dont wear hijab too and i dont drink, meet boys and smoke, so we are 100% positiv.

scarf cant make u a good person, but your heart.

Candice said...

What a stupid dumbass! I really hope your friend ditches this creep.

Ovais said...

He. Was. Such. An. !@#$%^&*.
No one has the right to judge anyone else like that.
Especially not for just not wearing a hijab. That is upto the woman.

Banana Anne said...

Astaghfirullah. That must have been infuriating. Insha'Allah that guy will take a long, hard look at himself, lose the judgmental nature towards others, and work on being the best Muslim he can be. I am so sorry you had to deal with that, and may ALLAH reward you for your patience.

Bonnie said...

Lol this kind of made me laugh and remember the various Saudi guys I used to date before converting. They would all sleep around, drink and sometimes smoke but tehy would only be marrying a girl who had never even laid eyes on a man before. They forget that the punishment for hypocrisy is so severe (but if they are drinking and fornicating anyway I doubt they care much)

MarieHarmony said...

I understand your frustration over this kind of comments. It's quite unbelievable but know that what is important is what you have in your heart and what your faith means to you.
Now I see around me many Muslim men, some are my husband friends, living a life of pleasure, partying, dancing, drinking, thinking they will then go back home and marry a chaste and honest Muslim woman, who will do as they said. I am sad for these women because they deserve better husbands than these guys.
Take care my dear.

Becky said...

Gosh, absolutely infuriating. I'd be waaaay pissed, as said before, hope your friend dumps this creep!

DD said...

wow that was a douche of epic proportions. i would have left instead of sitting with a fasiq like that. it disgust me how some of the men can play around all they like and expect to marry a chaste and pious sister. don't they know of the ayah: “Unclean women are for unclean men, and unclean men for unclean women. But good women are for good men, and good men for good women. These shall be cleared of calumny; forgiveness, and a generous provision, await them” (Al Quran 24:26).

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