How to deal with failure?

{ Sunday, March 18, 2012 }
Assalaamu aleykum!

On Thursday, I was called to do a job interview the following day. I was excited, because I wanted to make my own money and gain some independence from my parents. It was my first job interview, and I didn't know what to expect, so I visited my friend who works in the same company. She told me that I would have to do some tests, a lot of tests in fact. This made me feel nervous. She told me not to worry, but I did. I wanted the job, but I couldn't really know if this job would be good for me or not, so I prayed to God: "Please, if this job is good for me, let me have it. If it is bad for me, take it away from me". A kind of mini istikhara. I didn't pray to God to give me the job no matter what, because we as humans can never completely see the end results of something. God is the Most Wise, so He knows what's best for you.

I had told my mother on the phone about the job interview, and when I came back from my friend and found her at home, she was all of a sudden much kinder. I don't know why really, maybe because I'd told her the previous night that I would find a job and live on my own if she was so ashamed of me wearing hijaab. Maybe she got scared, because I seemed to be serious? Allahu 'Alem.
The following morning I left for the job interview. It's a bit painful to say, but they sent me back home after the first test. It was a phone test. I had to help a person who had questions about her taxes, which is something I know nothing about (prior knowledge was also not required). Anyway, I can't make my voice sound confident if I know nothing about the subject, so they didn't think me suitable for the job. I have to admit my ego was bruised, and I even wondered if my hijaab had anything to do with it, that they dismissed me so easily. But in the end, I hadn't asked God to give me the job no matter what, I had only asked to give me the job if it would be good for me! Maybe I can't see now why it wouldn't be good for me, but God most certainly does. And just doing the job interview had some positive results. I gained more experience in what's expected, and my parents are much kinder for the moment. Alhamdulillah.

God never promised us that everything we undertook would go swell. He did promise that He would reward those who are patient and put their trust in Him. Those who turn to Him in good and bad times, and have faith, even if things don't go their way. We are tested, so that we would learn to let go of our superficial attachment to results and success, and instead learn to rely completely on Him, because the reality is that we are in desperate need of Him.
So I will do my best to put my ego aside, and instead thank God for saving me from a job that would have been bad for me.

Allah swt says in the Quran:

"If My servants ask about Me, I am near. I answer the call of the caller when he calls on Me. They should therefore respond to Me and believe in Me so that hopefully they will be rightly guided." (Surat al-Baqara: 186)

"As for those who believe and do right actions - We impose on no soul any more than it can bear - they are the Companions of the Garden, remaining in it timelessly, for ever." (Surat al A'raf: 42)

"But as for him who is miserly and self-satisfied, and denies the Good, We will pave his way to difficulty. His wealth will not help him when he plummets to the depths. Assuredly, it is for Us to give guidance. (Surat al-layl: 8-12)

So everytime we fail at something we wanted to succeed in, we have to do our best to find the lessons and to show patience and faith. God is near, and He is our only true Sustainer and our best Guardian.

"Did We not lift up your heart and relieve you of the burden which weighed down your back? Did We not give you high renown? For truly, with hardship comes ease; truly, with hardship comes ease." (Surat al-inshirah: 1-6)

"You who believe! Remember Allah's blessing to you when forces came against you and We sent a wind against them and other forces you could not see. Allah sees what you do." (Surat al-Ahzab:9)

"Victory comes from no one but Allah. Allah is Almighty, All-Wise." (Surat al-Anfal: 10)

"Allah is your Protector. And He is the best of helpers." (Surat al-Imran: 150)

"If Allah helps you, no one can vanquish you. If He forsakes you, who then can help you? So the believers should put their trust in Allah." (Surat al-Imran: 160)

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "How remarkable a believer's affair is! For it is always to his advantage, and this is peculiar to none other than a believer. If something good happens to him, he gives thanks to Allah and this is to his advantage, and if something harmful happens to him, he endures it, and this is to his advantage also." (Sahih Muslim)

Alhamdulillah Rab al-Alameen. May Allah swt make us belong to those who are patient and have faith in the face of difficulty, and grant us Paradise, ameen.










10 comments:

the other side of me said...

Inspiring..:) somehow your words comforts me for something..Insya Allah,if its for good,I will surely get it..take care sister :)

Safiyah said...

Alhamdulillah :) I'm glad my words had a positive effect on you! Take care too!x

truth said...

Assalamu alaikum.
Masha allah,very nice post.
it helps someone who always blames Allah,situation and people for their own failures.
Ameeen for your du'aa.
REQUEST : can u change the font to the previous one if u don't mind pls?..this font is little bit irritating to read.
wassalam

Almost a Muslimah said...

ahh Sunshine, I'm sorry you didn't get the job . I know (you know I know! :) ) it can be very frustrating and bring you down, but I'm sure there is sth out there for you, which is probably more suitable :) hugs!

MarieHarmony said...

Patience is so challenging but a beautiful quality to gain. I am sure you will find a better job soon. Your thoughts are so inspiring and the Qu'ran quotes full of wisdom and good advice only if we take some time to reflect on them.
Thank you Safiyah. Stay well dear. xx

Safiyah said...

Thank you, Almost :) It did bring me down a bit, maybe because it was my first job interview. Take care and big hugs to you! xxx

Safiyah said...

Thank you, Marie, for your kind and encouraging words! I hope you are doing well! Take care of you xxx

Safiyah said...

Thank you!

DD said...

Ameen!

Thomas Watson said...

I had the same experience twice. It feels really bad to fail. But then I realized I just have to be patient. And soon enough I got a job.

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