An Acknowledgement

{ Thursday, April 12, 2012 }
Assalaamu aleykum w rahmatullah,

I hope you are all in good health and in the best state of imaan, inshaAllah.
Yesterday I wrote an angry post about Islamqa. It might seem funny, coming from someone who also has a post on her blog about not criticising people, and being patient with them. All I can say is that I'm writing my posts to share my insights, but also to learn. I'm not perfect and I do get angry with people.
I also promised myself that I wouldn't make my blog a source of negativity, with various rants. My anger yesterday made me forget the promise I made.
I can't say I feel all warm and fluffy when I read that site, on the contrary. I still think it gives a very inaccurate description of Islam, and it makes people intolerant. Usually I'm not too impressed by sheikhs like that, but what bothered me mostly is the influence that site has on others. But instead of giving criticism and even using bad words, I could have written a constructive post, which is what I'm going to do now, inshaAllah.

The quotes I posted yesterday have to do with the differences between men and women. According to Islamqa men are better, more intelligent and superior to women. First, this is against the Quran.

Their Lord responded to them: "I never fail to reward any worker among you for any work you do, be you male or female - you are equal to one another.[3:195]

As for those who lead a righteous life, male or female, while believing, they enter Paradise; without the slightest injustice.[4:124]

Surely for men who submit to Allah and for women who submit to Allah, for believing men and for believing women, for devout men and devout women, for truthful men and truthful women, for steadfast men and steadfast women, for humble men and humble women, for charitable men and charitable women, for fasting men and fasting women, for men who guard their chastity and women who guard their chastity, for men who remember Allah much and for women who remember Allah much, for all of them Allah has prepared forgiveness and a mighty reward. (33:35)

If men would have been "better" in the eyes of God, surely they would receive a higher reward? Which is clearly not the case here.
Furthermore, on the issue of intelligence. My experience in high school was that the grades of the girls were always higher than those of the boys. 
Besides, I don't know about you, but I value empathy and a caring personality more than cold distant rationality, which is what islamqa claims is the best. They dismiss the caring qualities of a woman while accusing her of crying at the smallest thing, while the men are big and strong and oh so smart. Let me tell you, if men were to bear children, don't you think our race would have been extinct by now? Women face tremendous pain in their lives, yet they bear it, and resurface even stronger. A woman might not be physically stronger than a man, but I'm convinced she can bear more emotionally. Do you think a man could bear to share his wife with another husband? Yet there are women who face the reality of having to share their husband every day. Maybe men and women are not exactly the same, but I really don't see the need to value the qualities of the man and patronising the woman and reduce her qualities to "weakness". Was it not Hagar who survived in the desert, while having to care for her son? Was it not Asiyah who's faith remained strong, even in the face of torture by her own husband? How is it possible that women are still labeled as "weak"?
What we need is to have women's qualities valued equally. And the best way of doing that is to start value your own qualities, and to refuse to be labeled less than a man. We have enough examples throughout history and in our daily lives that prove the many many beautiful and strong characteristics of women, and all the men who can't see those are deaf, dumb and blind. 

Here is another post I wrote on the beauty of women












6 comments:

MarieHarmony said...

Beautiful thoughts and images of women Safiyah. We always want to be the best we can be, but sometime something make us very angry and we have to tell it out loud. At least you reflected on it and agreed it was not maybe the best thing to do.
I agree sites like the one you cited give a bad vision of Islam and the way women are represented. I read things like this before but after talking with Muslims and reading the Qu'ran I realized it was wrong and I should think twice in the future. Thanks to all the ones who spread the true message of Islam. Be blessed Safiyah. Take care.xx

Safiyah said...

Thank you, Marie =) I think self-reflection is very important, and I hope I can learn to sit with my anger for a while before reacting on it.
I'm glad you were able to find your way and discover true Islam, because it's not easy. Take care of you! xxx

amatullah76 said...

Lovely. (I loathe that site too and will never understand its popularity among men AND women...)

Miss.O said...

Thank you for the follow sis! :)

Anne said...

Your acknowledgment here is one of the things that make women (and men too) beautiful. To be humble is to know how to praise, and to praise is to know how big we can be despite our frailties. You are truly beautiful!

Safiyah said...

Amatullah: Thank you! According to New Wife this site is blocked in Saudi. I wouldn't know why, since it sits so well with the Saudi mentality, but I find it a happy development indeed!

Miss. O: you're welcome sis =)

Anne: That's really sweet of you! Thank you! =)

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